Having C.F. can be really challenging for your self-esteem. Unfortunately, for us the characteristic of this disease can't be escaped!!
Growing up being very thin and being picked on for it can be difficult. I can't count how many times I've been told to eat a cheeseburger or made fun of for being "anorexic" when I wasn't. Hell, I didn't even know what anorexia was the first time I was "mocked" for it.
The worst part is people will never change and body image will always be a huge issue no matter who you are.
When you start to notice the little things that start to bother you like, your rib cage being slightly more noticeable than your "healthy" friends. Thus making your tops always fit differently than you think they should, can be discouraging. Wearing jeans in children's sizes well into your 20's can be a bit embarrassing, especially when name brands never fit and you want to be trendy like your friends. When you start to see what "clubbed nails" actually are compared to others it can be unnerving. It can be depressing if you go to a nail salon and have to explain it or the nail tech shows her coworkers your hands while speaking in other languages in front of you.
I know all of these things all to well and I'll be the first to admit it all still bothers me a little bit! Until I remember it's ALL my way of being beautiful and unique. The best part about all of these things is that you can learn what it's like to love the skin you're in a lot sooner than most people.
The upside to having Cystic Fibrosis, if you can see this as an upside, we tend to mature a lot quicker than most people our age. In turn we grasp life differently, because we have to!
☝️For example; When most teens are making sure their hair is just right for prom pictures, we are wondering if our PORT and scars are visible in our dress. College graduates worry they will fall off the stage when getting their diploma and embarrass themselves. While we worry about disturbing everyone by coughing through the entire two hour ceremony, with all eyes on us in disgust. When most people in their 20's are chasing their kids around trying to lose their baby weight, we are struggling to gain weight while planning lung transplant evaluations, hoping for a family one day.
Our insecurity issues are normally never the same as "healthy" people. In fact we have those issues and then some.
Knowing that our bodies are different is unfortunately one of the first realizations of having C.F. It's something we can't help, but to notice. Beauty standards and peer acceptance is forced down our throats from a young age. It's all about how we deal with it that matters!!
🚸This is where I, your support system, and the internet comes in handy. YOU'RE NOT ALONE in this stuggle! I promise!
The online C.F. community is a large one and for the most part can relate to one another when it comes to body image. Never be worried to reach out to another Cystic when you're feeling down and need to know someone else has been there and can help you through it!
Remember, CFers are beautiful! It's in our DNA to be different and stand out!! Which, in my opinion is a lot better than being a cookie cutter person! The sooner you understand that the happier you'll be with your own body image.
🛇I must point out we are all different and not EVERY Cystic has thought these things or goes through the same situations. As we are all different!!
Never Alone,
Sandi
