I was born to the best the most caring and loving people. I couldn't have asked for better parents.
♥Note they "went in half's on a baby" at least that's what I have been told my whole life. If not I wouldn't have happened!
However when making this plan I don't think I was what they had in mind. This tiny little flaw in life, screaming and crying for 26 years! I know my parents were expecting and wanted a healthy baby. What father doesn't listen to his new born babies first cry and count their fingers and toes? Making sure they were born as all would hope. Well our genes made a hiccup and I was born with a "death sentence" known as Cystic Fibrosis.
My mom and dad were unable to see me for the first few months after I was born because the hospital kept me. All my mom had (a month after I was born) was a small mothers day card with my photo in it. I hate that photo so much it makes me want to scream.
♥ I did post it already as a photo on another blog. It is just heartbreaking especially for a mother lost and in the dark about the health of her newborn baby girl.
My dad knew what CF was and knew I could live a fulfilled life as he grew up with my cousins who all had CF. He just wasn't in the "know" as to what all it had to mean. The things that would have to happen the changes needed to be made as a family to keep me here.
I feel like I held my parents back at times, making it to were they could not make that deal for half a baby again. Luckily my parents had children from prior marriages. So we had a full family. My sister being 10 years older than me and my brother being 8 years older than me. I was the baby and it was almost as if I were the only child. By the time I was 8 my sister was 18 and had babies of her own. While my brother was a typical boy and pretty much was never home, then he moved out.
I have such an amazing spiritual connection with my parents. They took care of me, yelled at me, forced me to take meds, and were always understanding and aware of what I was doing.
♥I used to HATE doing anything in our town when I was younger my dad would get calls, "Hey I've got eyes on Sandi she's walking on Morgantown Ave with a blonde girl." Oh how I love that now. Admit it fellas I know who still does it, only now you can have eyes on me via internet and in person.
My mother had a rough and rocky road when I was born, up until I was about 4 or 5 years old I believe. She fought with hospitals, nurses, and doctors. Who were so blind to CF in 1987 in Florida. That they said I was malnourished and my mother was starving me. She got arrested for taking me AMA(against medical advice) from a hospital in Florida because they were using me as a guinea pig! Luckily it was resolved quickly, I was placed in foster care until it was straighten out. The doctors finally realized I was just a normal CFer and was failing to thrive, not absorbing, and not eating because I was a fussy hurt baby.
I know there were times my parents were overwhelmed by my health and all of the complications including medication and treatments. They never let me see that or let me know how they were bothered. I never saw anything on their faces but love, support, care, and hope when they looked at me the entire time I was growing up.
♥They are stronger than I ever will be. Having doctors treat me as they did in my first few months I was alive. Is enough to make someone go insane!
Growing up they knew there would be complications they knew it would be hard they knew they had a lot to blow in their faces as I got older and my health would get worse. My parents never ever told me "No". I know that was part because of them never knowing how long I had to be with them and part because they wanted to see how far I could push myself and make myself stronger. This was something that I know my siblings didn't care for. I hate that aspect because I understand both sides.
♥My mom even let me try out for the high school track team. Knowing it was going to be a very hard sport to attempt for me to do. I did it for a full 2 days then sadly was done with that. My parents would smile and simply say "you tried".
I was able to go to them for anything. As a Cystic we still have questions like any normal kid. Questions about sex, drugs, smoking, life, and how to's. I would ask hey what is "insert drug here" "I need birth control" and they would tell me and then advice me not to do anything drug related.
♥Luckily my Cf scared the bejesus out of me to try any type of hardcore scary drugs. I was always afraid of what my meds would do mixing with crazy drugs. I just knew what friends were doing and would want to know what it was. They would tell me, and say "its not a good idea baby but if you do and something happens we are a call away." If I was 3 sheets to the wind they would come get me no matter what time it was.
So I guess what I am saying is, embrace your Cystic's let them try anything they want and figure it out for themselves. I have noticed parents now are so worried about their Cystic's and seem to put them in a bubble. Don't do that! I love that my parents treated me like a normal kid. I got dirty, played outside, sat at bonfires, went fishing, camping, road trips, raced dirt bikes, cheered, participated in everything I could. They didn't start panicking when I coughed, they could tell the bad ones from the good. Teaching me to know my limits. During it all I had two of the best and amazing fans, parents, and now best friends always there rooting me on!!
There is nothing wrong with you're Cystic's playing sports, getting dirty, going to sleepovers, and school trips. Myself and older Cystic's did the same things, we were all out playing being rough and tumble kids.
♥We must have been doing something correctly because there are a lot CF adults and we didn't need to worry so much about germs and playing and having a semi normal childhood.
★Hell when I started working at The Playboy Mansion my parents were supporting me the whole time!! Along with working at Hooters, that was actually a joke between me and my father and ended up being an amazing and one of my favorite jobs. With my dad saying they wouldn't hire me because I didn't have the "Hooters" and I got hired before our meals were on the table.
Needless to say, I was not the baby they imagined but I am the baby that showed them miracles, smiles, perseverance, and motivation can make ANYTHING possible! All of these attributes about me come from the both of them!!
My daddy and me!!! My hero, my daddy, and my go to for everything!!! I love you so much daddy! Time to tell these diseases to kiss our ass!
My beautiful mommy!! You've always been my best friend even when you didn't know it! You are my rock and one hell of a strong woman!